Guys, I'm gonna do ya a solid tonight. I guarantee this'll benefit you.
We women sometimes rant and rave or bitch about something, but it's NOT for the purpose of getting you to fix it for us. We often just need to VENT ~and you can relate to that, can't ya?
When we get together with our gal pals, we vent. We just have to get our shit out there, and we don't expect anyone to FIX it. The mistake YOU make, is thinking you have to somehow make ua feel better, and YA DON'T.
Maybe you grew up having to take care of your mom's feelings and needs, and maybe you didn't~ but you can destroy your romantic bond with a woman, if you keep trying to rescue her from what You perceive to be her 'troubles.'
Now, the caveat here is, if you're sleeping with a young child who's encased in an adult woman's body~ namely, a Borderline, ignore all of the above. They're not exactly what you can consider to be well adjusted and competent. It could feel at times, like a full-time job having to micro-manage every crisis or speed-bump she hits.
Other than that, if you're with a grown up, someone you respect, admire and trust (what a concept!), know that she can handle most of her own shit, and even if she's wildly expressive about it, you're not expected to roll up your sleeves and offer a solution!
If she ASKS you for your point of view or some guidance or help, that's one thing~ but if she doesn't, tell her you have the utmost confidence in her that she'll work it all out, because 98% of the time, SHE WILL.
Lest you forget my dear men~ REAL women aren't with ya because they NEED you. They're with ya because they WANT you.