I've never been drawn to Borderlines in my romantic life. I don't crave intensity, drama, uncertainty, or instability. If I picked up on even a whiff of that stuff in someone I just met, sirens wailed and bright red flashing lights would make me RUN like my hair was on fire.
I enjoy my own company. I've grown quite fond of myself, and there's nobody I respect or admire more than Me. I love serenity and tranquility. Quiet and calm are my essential comfort zones. If anything disrupts my tranquility, I rid myself of it immediately.
I always wanted to know where I stood with someone, and still do. I despise guessing games, and if ya act in ways that make me feel uneasy, it doesn't matter whether that's because of Your stuff or My stuff, I'm outta there~ because no matter who's at fault, it's obviously not a fit for me.
I've been as intrigued as hell about BPD since I first began learning and writing about it. It interested me enough to author 25 articles on that topic. Thankfully, being clinically fascinated by a disorder never spilled over onto being romantically fascinated by it.
Plenty of licensed psychiatrists and clinical psychologists have contacted me for help to overcome their obsession with a borderline disordered lover. Every single one of em felt deeply ashamed they got caught in a Borderline's web. They all thought they "should have known better."
The truth is, nothing in MY schooling touched on this topic, and theirs probably didn't either. It's not reading and gaining insight that stops you from getting ensnared by a Borderline. It's your gut.
If you've been Thinking your way thru life and analyzing the shit our of your feelings in your head instead of Feeling your way thru every life situation and letting your instincts and intuition guide you in making RIGHT choices, you haven't got a prayer in the world when it comes to avoiding these messed-up people.
They're all charming. Many look great on paper. Some are highly successful lawyers, therapists, surgeons, etc., and you think they're totally sane, because those are the only parts they show you, as you're being seduced.
Your GUT will never lie to you. If your excitement comes in the form of feeling a little danger with someone new, you're as messed up as they are, and I'm sure you two will have an intensely exciting roller-coaster ride for as long as it lasts~ which for the most part, will only be a few months . . .
and then, you'll go in search of someone a bit dangerous and NEW, who will help you feel intensely alive again~ because sadly, you've never learned how to respect, admire or live happily with yourself.