A former Facebook follower objected to my opinions about allowing children to make life-altering decisions re gender reassignment. Apparently, she felt that going along with her minor daughter's decision to radically change her body was the right thing to do, based on how painful a time both had gone thru prior to his/her transitional surgeries.

"To each his/her own," I've always said, but when I queried the mom about whether her child seemed happy and content NOW, the mother un-friended me, without replying. I sensed at the time, that was answer enough.

Happiness is an INSIDE job. Nobody else can "make" you happy, or magically turn your life into the fairytale you dreamed about as a kid. If this COULD happen, divorces would be practically non-existent.

No augmentation or reconstruction you do to your 'outside' alters your 'inside' opinion of yourself. No matter how you change your looks, poor self-worth will color how you see yourself, lifelong. A body-builder for instance, may never feel muscular or powerful enough, if he was a skinny, weak little kid who couldn't escape daily beatings form his sociopathic dad.

Oh sure, we can get a nose job, a boob job, a little filler here or there, but does it actually RAISE our happiness quotient, if we haven't yet figured out how to like, admire and respect ourself? No, it doesn't, because it can't. We're already convinced since childhood, that we're not good enough or lovable.

Anorectics see themselves as "fat," no matter HOW much weight they lose. They could be mere skeletons with flesh covering their bones, and they continue to starve themselves due to a condition called, body dysmorphia. Body dysmorphia is exceptionally common among people with Borderline Personality Disorder traits.

A fat child is an unhappy child. So is a child who thinks they're hideous or at the very least, unappealing. Millions of young children can't begin to understand WHY they feel sad, empty or depressed. They blame the dark feelings they struggle with on their physical appearance, as it's all that makes sense to a depressed, underdeveloped mind.

Many Borderlines are addicted to plastic surgeries, tattoos, body piercings, and other forms of physical augmentation including transgender surgery, in order to feel better about themselves. The problem is, the novelty of those procedures wears off pretty quickly, and they once again begin obsessing over what to next "have fixed."

When all is said and done, how joyful ARE these folks? Midlife crisis is simply about having accomplished the tasks at a particular level of our development, and desiring more. Human nature tends to believe that when we've reached a certain level of success and we have all the planes, boats, cars and homes we want, we will be "HAPPY."

Would that it were true. Thousands of super-wealthy people are desperately unhappy, yet they've gotten everything they've ever dreamed of~ at least, materially. Successful celebrities fall in love, yet can't maintain a relationship bond. They abuse alcohol, drugs and plastic surgery to fight their dark demons, so we know full well, THEY haven't found a way to live joyfully~ even with all their fame and fortune.

These are merely metaphorical examples for why an unhappy child should not be permitted to consent to hormone therapy and gender reassignment surgery (besides, they are not the holders of health insurance policies, folks). Kids are counseled by other desperately unhappy children to threaten suicide, if their parent blocks their efforts to transition~ so the parent is emotionally BLACKMAILED into submitting to the child's whim.

Perhaps what's really NEEDED, is a rational enough parental unit who recognizes their child's profound distress, and finds them a solid mental health professional, to help them discover why that is! I personally believe that it's the parent's denial of their OWN dysfunction they'd rather not risk having uncovered by a gifted practitioner their kid 'might' be lucky enough to visit.

This of course, begs the question: IS the well-being of one's child really a priority for this parent? And what did it take for them put their overly-busy lives aside long enough to see the unmistakable signs of sadness and dismay in their kid?

A solid therapist (and there are precious few) might help this confused child realize it's not their body configuration that's the SOURCE of their pain, but rather the chronic lack of attention and love from a mom who's looking just as hard (in all the wrong places) for a 'quick fix' to rectify her child's unhappiness.

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