People with BPD traits never admit to being wrong. It's always "the customer's fault," it's "the client's fault" (and trust me, far too many psychotherapists think and operate this way).

When a crisis or setback hits a couple, Borderlines always blame their spouse~ no matter WHAT has happened. But why does this occur? Healthy, normal people with decent ego strength and self-esteem, can hold themselves accountable. They can admit they've made a mistake. They're willing to make amends for their errors. Not Borderlines.

A Borderline might offer, "I'm sorry you feel that way," but will never say, "I'm sorry I hurt you," even if it was unwitting on their part. The Borderline personality has a persecution complex. The world is against them, as far as they can tell. People can't be trusted. Those who disappoint or disagree with them are painted black, and vilified (sound anything like our current administration??).

The Borderline personality will not listen to reason. Their way of seeing the world is the "ONLY way," and there's nothing you can say or do, to change their mind (or open it to an alternate point of view)~ regardless of how much rational and factual information you present them with in your argument.

People with BPD will fight to the death to defend their perspective, because the core shame they live with is of monumental proportion. When faced or confronted with having made a mistake or error in judgment, they have a shame attack, and feel just as unworthy of love and respect for their feelings as they did as little children, growing up with severely defective parents.

When we look around our workplace and see odd, erratic or hyper-reactive behaviors in our coworkers, it's not The Human Race that's the problem. It's undiagnosed, untreated Borderline Personality Disorder traits, and about 80% of the world's population (conservatively) lives with this unfinished business from childhood that impinges on the lives of the rest of us, making copasetic, harmonious relationship dynamics virtually impossible.

Don't blame humanity for being nuts. Blame the people who raised these BPD individuals to have no sense of lovability or worth~ and there, but for the Grace of God, go we.

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